Memories of Summer

Act 6: Early Autumn for Summer

God help me. I think I'm falling in love. With an engaged woman.

I can't. I just can't. This is not right. We have known each other for what? Two days? And here I am contemplating to break her engagement with her childhood friend. Well, it's not that bad if I think she does like me too right? I mean, she went out on a date with me. On Valentines Day. Freaking Valentines Day . She went out with me, a complete stranger. I don’t know about you, but in my dictionary that means “I like you too even if I'm engaged."

God I hate this. Why does she have to be engaged anyway? She's only freakin' twenty-one. It's not like she's gonna die in a few months time and she really needs to get married quick. I mean, what’s the rush? I know. That's just me being bitter. I never really dated again after Victoria and I decided to call it quits. But puhleaaase― Who gets married at twenty-one these days? Oh, hang on. Let me think. The only plausible reason for a girl to get married at an early age is when she got knocked up.

Ok. Aside from being bitter, I am now being speculative here… no. More like accusative. Great. Just great.

Don't mind me.

But really! What kind of name is Jo Kyuchun anyway? I bet he is some computer geek who stays in his mom's basement to play StarCraft II or even worse some classic Diablo. Whoever he is, I bet he wouldn’t be awesome enough to suit her. I mean she is beautiful and smart. And kind. And… Ok. Maybe I don't know her all that well. We met two days ago. But still, I'm sure she is made of pure awesome. I just know it. And no guy will ever be good enough for her especially now that she is only twenty-one, and she hasn’t realized yet that maybe she likes me more than whoever that Cho Kyumin is.

I sound desperate, right? Sigh.

I dunno. It’s just that. These past few days I’ve…. I’ve been feeling incredibly lonely. Not just the kind of lonely that can be cured by having someone by your side to say everything’s fine. I tried patching things up with Vic but it’s not the same. It’s not that. It’s a deeper kind of lonely that makes you think “What the hell am I doing with my life?” As if there’s this hole in your stomach and no matter what you try to stuff in it, it just gets bigger and bigger till the hole eats you up from the inside. It’s as if there’s something important stolen from your life, and you don’t even know what it is.

It’s sad to be sad. Even sadder if you don’t know what you are sad about.

And then there she comes, like some beacon of light. Suddenly everything feels right again. Everything seemed to shine…. I kid you not. You know what they say that when you’re in love? That everything seems to be colorful and lovely? It is like that! Like everything is in technicolor ―in an HD tv with 3d glasses. Like all the birds are singing and people are dancing in some untold cheesy musical where we are the leads. Damn. I sound so corny.