Pairing: DB5K and Kyu-line [both friendship -__-]
Genre: crack
Rating: G
Length: One-shot
In idol groups, the oldest one should be the leader who all the members respect and obey. Except for my Jaejoong hyung who copped out of the position and responsibility, this is a rule of thumb. An unwritten law. In a perfect world where such rules are strictly followed, Jungsoo hyung would be the most badass group leader in the history of Kpop idol groups. Leading a thirteen-piece idol group is no easy task.There were only five of us and Yunho hyung had major headaches. Now he only has to worry about me, but really, it’s the other way around. It is a big big responsibility. Especially, when these members that we are talking about are Super Junior— a bunch of obnoxious overgrown kids who think that everything is a stupid game and that the world is their playground. But truthfully, reality doesn’t always conform to expectations. Behind the cameras—as we all know it— it is Kyuhyun who really calls the shots among them. The evil maknae.
To be honest, I don’t really have anything against being an evil maknae. In fact, we all know that I am the one who started this maknae rebellion trend. Blame it all to Junsu hyung who stole my cute image and Jaejoong hyung who robbed me off of my innocence by introducing me to those special videos. Kyuhyun is my man, a bro and a good follower of my teachings on how to be snarky, so I really approve of this maknae rebellion as a first step to rule the world….. I kid, ok? I kid. Me plotting world domination with GaemKyu is an exaggeration by our crazy fans. Although I do admit that the idea is pretty cool.
But then again, it’s a-whole-nother story when I get entangled in his schemes against my will. And that is what is happening this very moment. Seven in the morning. We are at SM Entertainment’s office, having a meeting in one of the biggest board rooms. Everyone is here: the sunbaes Kangta, BoA, and TRAX sat side by side; Super Junior, or a least nine of them ran about throwing crumpled papers at each other; the actors, seated at one side of the room― yes Kibum is in this section and truthfully, I’m not even surprised; SHINee, all quiet as Key scolded. All I heard over the noise were the words ‘bedroom’, ‘mess’, ‘umma’ and ‘dead; Sonyeo Shidae who intermixed with f(x) chattering; The Grace, Dana and Sunday taking selcas in one corner; and then there’s Yunho hyung and me. Bored. I scanned through the hand-outs they gave and drank down my macchiato to wake myself up. I was almost drifting back to sleep with my eyes wide open when my phone vibrated inside my pocket.
Changmin hyung, can you see me?Saranghaeyo. Kkkkk~ ^^
Sent: 12-12-11, 07:34amNumber: 019 XXXX YYYY
I glanced at the other side of the room and saw him there. Waving at me his mobile phone, (which is by the way identical to mine, and Kyuhyun’s. We all bought the same model. Kyu calls it the Kyu-line phone) like a little child waiting for his mom after kindergarten classes. It is beyond me why he texts even when we are in the same room. Ugh. And people still can’t get over that radio show where I said that to Kyuhyun. It’s not like I didn’t do aegyo back then when I was too young to know that what I was doing was embarrassing.
Sender: Changmin Hyung No, Minho. I don’t see you. I’m blind.<.< Sent: 12-12-11, 07:36am Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
♪♫Keudaeyo naegero wa
Come to me
Geudae nae soneul jabayo, hayan haneureul nara.
Hold my hands, and we’ll fly in the white sky.
I'll be there, Snow dream under the sky. Uri gyeoul iyagi
I'll be there, Snow dream under the sky. Our winter story.♪♫
In case you are wondering why we are all here, it’s because of a stupid Christmas charity concert. Yes. You heard it right. Charity. SM Entertainment Company is not all that bad like how you probably see it. Somehow, they have a little space in their hearts for some charity. We will be performing on Christmas day for a Korean Tourism Department fund raising concert aimed at international fans. The tickets are pretty cheap compared to regular SM Town concerts, so flying over to Korea is all worth it. Fans get to see us on Christmas day. The proceeds of which will go to orphanages and homes for the aged. SM Entertainment gets the promotion instead of some other entertainment company, like say JYP or YG. Korean tourism gets a holiday boost. (Not only a spike in flight bookings, but also in other industries. You don’t expect the international fans to fly in, watch and then fly out. They will book hotels and need transportation around Seoul. Eat. Shop. And shop some more. They will spend money in this country. That’s Kpop as a boosting agent of Seoul’s economy for you. And yes, that’s me being a smartass because we all know that I am the smartest idol in Korea.) Everybody wins. And we all have a merry little Christmas freezing our asses off on the stage instead of being cozy in our own homes with our families like normal human beings like the other years―and oh before I forget; we are doing this without getting paid for it. Because yes, again, it is for charity. Although the company probably gets paid for it behind our backs, for all we knew.
You’d think that by now, I’ve probably gotten used to such bull because I’ve stayed behind unlike my three other hyungs. And honestly, you are right. I’m totally chill with the idea of working on Christmas since I’m a Buddhist anyway. And I wouldn’t even throw them the “This is a family day!” crap too. I’m cool with it. Totally cool. Until my genius of a best friend came up with a very bright idea. Blame the management for giving us the liberty to choose what to perform ‘coz they couldn’t care less since it’s just a charity concert.
“Let’s perform Show Me Your Love!” He had his I’m-so-excited face plastered on. His wide grin showed his gums. It reminds me of HyukJae hyung. Yah. You didn’t brush your teeth, did you? I see some bits of seaweed.
“Come on. Minnie-ah… My hyungs already said yes. Even Kibum. ” I smell kimbap, why didn’t you even share to your best friend?
“First off, stop calling me Minnie-ah. It’s not cute, I swear. Second, they always say yes to whatever you want. And third. No. Just… no. Not cool.” He should know by now that aegyo only works on hyungs and girls. I am younger than him by fifteen days and I’m not gay. Better luck next time Cho Kyuhyun.
Meomchul suman itdamyeon
If only I could stop it.
Jiul suman itdamyeon
If only I could erase it.
Dashi dora gandamyeon
If only I could go back.
Maybe you’d like to know why I’d say no to my bestest best friend in the whole wide world. Well, you see, I put up with pretty much all of the fuckery that was going on in whatever was left of Dong Bang Shin Gi after my hyungs left (that would be Yunho hyung and me).
First, I reassumed my cute maknae image because honestly, you don’t want to see hyung aegyo too much. I willingly sacrificed a “Saranghaeyo Kyuhyunah” aegyo in the radio show to keep the embarrassing aegyo of Yunho hyung off cam, even if it convinced people that I’m gay for Kyu. Fuck my life.
I also took over not only Jaejoong hyung’s responsibility as the lead vocalist, but also as the official chest -flasher of the group since Yunho hyung’s moobs are too ladylike for television. And yeah, how could I forget to mention that I am now also his personal house help since it’s only us two― and Siwon’s god knows that if I didn’t clean our apartment people would soon mistake it as a junkshop. I wouldn’t complain in official interviews if it wasn’t that bad. And worst off all, by staying with Yunho hyung, it’s as if I signed up consent for hundreds of fan fiction writers making HoMin fics. Damn, I hate being the bottom in the pairing… just because I am younger. I hate being paired with other men. Period. Extreme skinship in pictorials and Yunho hyung saying all those bull in interviews about me being like water and –le gasp― his WIFE… and other gay as a unicorn barfing rainbows crap isn’t helping either. It’s not like we don’t know that he used to say the exact same lines about Jaejoong hyung a few years ago. Yes, I’m totally judging that.
I would also rant about being the new sub-rapper and second main dancer of the group which we all know is a big joke since it’s just the two of us anyway, but I have a bigger rant right here, right now. I’ve unwillingly consented to all this hogwash (not to be confused to the awesomeness of Hogwarts) but there is one thing that is beyond my stomach. And that is singing our old songs.
It took a lot of bribing and drama when they made us perform Rising Sun and Mirotic as a duo the first time. I swore that that would be the last… but it wasn’t. They tricked me when they made us sing Balloons with SHINee. They just pushed me onstage and gave me a mic. Next thing I knew we were singing Balloons. I would’ve totally cut a bitch that day if not for Minho trying to calm me down. And oh, Somebody to Love 2011 version is a blatant lie concocted by SM Entertainment. They used the old clips we recorded way back then for my parts and added in Yunho hyung’s. We used to have such system of trying out different part distributions to figure out which lines suited whose voice best. Same thing happened for MAXIMUM. I wouldn’t have agreed to perform that live if only my father didn’t threaten to beat the shit out of me if I didn’t comply. We all know that the only reason that I stay is because my parents say so. Truthfully, my mom still wishes that somehow I’d end up marrying BoA someday, which is the main reason she made my audition for SM by the way. Crazy fan girls. They never grow up. And my mom had to be one.
I’d put up with anything. Just don’t make me sing a song that I used to sing with my hyungs. It disheartens me. It makes me think that whoever sings their parts are taking their memories away from me. Memories. That’s all I have of them now. I want to remember these songs with their voices one with ours. I don’t want their voices erased. I love my best friend but I also love my hyungs…although it doesn’t really show. I thought Kyu understood me in this one. He is lucky he has a lot of hyungs coddling him, and HanKyung hyung still had good connection with them even if he left.
In my case, there is only Yunho hyung and me.
Eotteohke neoreul ijeulkka?
How could I forget you?
Ijeuryeogo aereul sseo bolkka?
Should I try to forget?
Dashi dora galsun eobseulkka?
Can’t we go back to what it used to be?
As much as we would want to get the three hyungs who left us back here, we couldn’t. The company changed our numbers often and moved us to a new apartment. It is outrageous how we are the only two people in SM Town who are not allowed to have a twitter account or any other way to get through them. The company is clearly afraid that we would leave too. And even if I somehow begged Hyukjae hyung into giving me Junsu hyung’s number and Yunho hyung was able to meet Jaejoong hyung a few times secretly, the answer was always the same. Until SM drafts a better contract for them, they are staying with C-JeS. I sound like an emo-kid here right now. Not cool.
♪♫You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout
I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is comin' to town.
He's making a list
Checking it twice
He's gonna find out
Who's naughty or nice
Santa Claus is comin' to town♪♫
“Oh come on Changminnie… Minho would sing with us.” He hooked his arm over my shoulder. I wobbled on my seat. If my coffee hadn’t ran out, it would’ve spilled over the hand-outs now. Yah. Did you use a deodorant today Kyuhyunah? Your underarm is rubbing on my shirt.
“What the hell is SHINee gonna do if we will snatch one of their members for our performance?” I tried to argue him out of it. You can’t make me, DraKyu. You can’t make me.
“Changmin Hyuuuuung~ it’s ok. It’ll be fun. Besides, Taemin will have his own moment playing the piano as Yeonhee noona sings. Key will perform with TRAX. Jonghyun hyung has SM the Ballad. I’m sure Jinki hyung is up to something too. I’m the only one who doesn’t have anything to do. Pleaaaaase…. Hyuuuung~” Minho just popped in and sat beside me, putting his arm over my shoulder too while pouting like a duck. I’m sandwiched between these two idiots. Cool.
Aishh! What the hell is this strategy Cho Kyuhyun? You really had to connive with Minho to beg and aegyo attack me to get what you want. Cheap trick! I never should have brought you two close together. The only reason Minho is in Kyu-line because I didn’t want you jealous that I have another best friend.
“Stop it Choi Minho. Your pouting makes my skin crawl. I told you not to use that unless you are totally desperate for airtime in variety shows. Aish... Ok. Ok. Fine. I’ll do it. You two are so dead.” I glared at them while they glomped the living air out of me. I swear I’ll get my revenge on these two someday. Just wait for it.
“Hyung…. Gomawoyo! Aing~” Minho winked and wrapped his arms around me.
“Stop it Minho. Not funny.” Kyu is silently smug as I playfully hit Kyu-line’s maknae.
“Consider it as a Christmas gift for your bestfriends Minnie. Santa will give you a gift on Christmas if you’re on his nice list, you know?” He smiled. It looked scary.
“I’m a Buddhist. Reserve the Christian talk for Siwon hyung.” I scoffed. Not that I have anything against Santa or Christianity in general. Junsu hyung is a Christian too. And he probably still believes in Santa Claus. But I’m just too pissed right now that they made me agree to something I said I wouldn’t do.
“Some holiday spirit you have there. We have a gift for you too. Right, Minho?” SHINee’s tallest nodded enthusiastically. They exchanged eye-smiles and giggled like little girls. Ugh. Whatever it is, I don’t like it.
“If it’s another one of those lifelike dolls, then don’t bother. Please― I had a hard time explaining to my mom why such a toy was delivered to our house in my name last year. You sick perverts.”
“You show no appreciation. Her name was Summer, and we had her customized to look like Han Gain. We can send Han Yeseul this year.” I think I just had a minor stroke. The doll was nothing near Han Gain, more like Shin Bongsun. Not that I would have used or even kept it if it did look like Han Gain. It was plain creepy.
“Oh, would you like real people then?” I crumpled the paper handouts and threw it at them before chasing them both out of the room.
Sender: Choi Minho Hyung, Gomawoyo. Kyuhyun hyung said Saranghae <333 :-* chu~ Sent: 12-12-11, 08:13am Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Someone tell me why am I hanging out with these guys again?
Tada imawa kimiga shiawase dearuto negai
We can only wish that you are happy
Bokurano kaidanwo hitotsuhitotsu nobotte ikuyo
We will climb our stairs one by one
Bokurawa mada bokurano miraiwo souzou shinagara, kimiwo matteruyo
We are still waiting for you, imagining our future
The schedule for the day is done. Yunho hyung went to the kitchen to fix something for the both of us. I checked the home phone for messages recorded during the day. Probably just some crazy fan girls screaming again like last night. Our number got leaked― again. We told manager hyung the other day, but it’s gonna take a week or two before we get a new one. I pressed play and instead of girls screaming, I heard Minho’s voice from the loudspeaker... At least I won’t hear “Saranghae oppa!” tonight.
“Hyung. Are you home now?”
No, Minho. I’m not. I’m out. Partying. That’s why I’m listening to your voice mail right now.
“Cheongmal gomawoyo~~~ Saranghaeyo!” There was some scratching noise, then another voice.
“Changmin hyung, Changmin hyung. It’s Onew~ can you hear me? Yah, Minho move over so hyung can hear me too. I’m part of this too. Yah… ouch! Uh… hyung? Are you there?”
No, Onew. I’m in Disney Land. Hang on a second, Mickey Mouse is pulling a rabbit out of his nose.
“Hyung~~~~Saranghae!” Ok. Maybe I was wrong about the ‘saranghae’ part.
“Oww! Minho you are stepping on my foot!”
“Changmin hyung… Anny―”
“Wait! I have things to say to...”
“Yah! Hyung you’re spoiling it.”
“Ah, wae? I’m just telling him to...” There was silence but I heard muffled sounds.
“Bye Changmin hyung.”
These kids are really weird. Why are they so excited about this damned Christmas charity concert? As if they don’t work hard enough all year round. And why do I sound like such a grouch? It’s not like I’d die physically if I let them have their fun. And it’s also not like I haven’t done things like this before. I can just pretend to smile and then roll my eyes at myself after the performance.
I pressed the button for the next message to play.
The voice is familiar and struck a chord in my heart a happy yet painful one.
“Changminah, Yunhoya... are you listening? It’s Jaejoong hyung....” his voice is soft, warm and almost breaking. I pressed pause and ran to the kitchen to drag hyung out to the living room.
“Has Yunho been feeding you well Changmin? Has he stopped drinking? Yah Yunhoya... take care of yourself. You’re looking older lately... Don’t think of us too much. We are doing good.. I …. I don’t know if this one will get through or manager hyung will delete it again before you can hear it… I just want to say that we all miss you.” I can hear him silently sniffing like he used to when he cried but didn’t want anyone else to know. Hyung hasn’t changed. Crying inside his heart. Tss.
“Yoochun told me… he wants you to know that he is happy that TVXQ is still the top searched idol group in Japan…. And about Junsu.... I don’t know if you had read his tweets but... Junsu has already forgiven you Yunho. He was just emotional that time…
“Have you heard our songs? Yunho, the song I told you about last year, it’s in our album. Did you hear it? And Changminah, don’t get jealous ok? We have a song that is for the two of you. Of course we won’t forget our maknae. If you haven’t heard it yet I will sing it right now just for you two, ok?....” We heard the songs hyung. We heard them, and it made us miss the three of you all the more. Come back to us quickly. Please come back.
“Itsuka aeru kara mewo tojiru tabi kimiwo omou...”
Our paths would meet again. I am thinking of you every time I close my eyes.
“Kimiga irukotoga imamo mada atarimae nandayo.”
It’s still natural that you are by our side.
“How is it? Nice right? Uhm.... I’ve been talking too much. That’s it for now. Bye… Saranghae.” I thought I’ve heard too much saranghae from the phone tonight but coming from Jaejoong hyung... I wouldn’t complain.
Yunho hyung was quiet all throughout. I can see a splice of joy and sadness in his eyes. He got up and opened the fridge but closed it at once.
“I removed all the alcoholic drinks hyung. Don’t even bother trying to go out to buy some. You heard Jaejoong hyung.” I said in a low voice. He went to his room and turned the lights off even if it was too early.
We have schedules tomorrow but something was telling me that he is not gonna get a wink of sleep. Jihye noona will scold him again and pull all her blonde hair off out of frustration of hyung’s dark circles that will be impossible to conceal with makeup.
♪♫Just shoot for the stars if it feels right
And aim for my heart if you feel like it
And take me away. And make it ok. I swear I’ll behave.♪♫
Practice is over for today. I’m not less bummed out about it. Apparently, Kyu somehow found a way to break Kangin and Heechul hyung out of military service for a few days. We left their spots vacant. And by some miracle, Kibum was there to rehearse with us. HanKyung hyung’s spot was filled in by ZhouMi. It’s amusing how they think that you can just replace a Chinese man with another, as if fans wouldn’t really notice the difference. Henry is in Canada for some family thing so he can’t fill a spot. Onew will sing Junsu hyung’s parts. Minho will do Yoochun hyung’s rap even if English is not exactly his specialty and Kyu will replace Jaejoong hyung… Replace? What the hell am I saying? No one can replace my hyungs. Kyu will sing his parts but replacement is a word I don’t really like hearing in the same sentence with my hyungs’ names.
They tried. They tried looking for replacements once. None of the trainees measured up. Merging us with KRY was another crazy idea they wanted to try. I told them I would leave if they continue with this bullshit. I love Kyu, Wook and Jongwoon hyung but Dong Bang Shin Gi has always been Jaejoong, Yunho, Yoochun, Junsu and Changmin. It will always be. Even if we are separated right now.
Back to reality, I am being mugged again by the Kyu-line. We are at a noraebang right now. I’m mechanically tapping a red tambourine on my hand while Ryeowook does a repeat performance of his SS4 solo and everyone else was wildly cheering.
Just so you know, Wookie didn’t lose his virginity yet, as people have been speculating. What he lost is a bet to Kyuhyun and Minho.
♪♫Take me by the tongue and I’ll know you.
Kiss me till you’re drunk and I’ll show you
All the moves like Jagger, all the moves like Jagger
I’ve go the moves like Jagger♪♫
The bet goes like this. They should get a piece of undergarment from any female member of SM Town. As long as it was owned by a biological female signed under our label, the undies are accepted so Amber’s boxer shorts are also fair game. I’m not stupid enough to join their choding bet. I bailed out by buying them drinks. As we all know, Kyuhyun is close friends with Victoria. And although I’m sure that explaining to Vic why he needed her bra was as awkward as him trying to sexy dance, she gave it after half an hour of convincing. Minho on the other hand has his way with the noonas and the hyungs. It is no secret that SNSD is extremely biased towards any SHINee member especially our dear Minho. Oh, do they love him. He returned with nine matching pairs of lingerie. (Seohyun wears granny panties! I kid you not.) I’m not sure if I’d be amused or have a migraine.
Ryeowook isn’t crazy enough to snatch a random panty from someone’s closet so he lost the bet. Poor kid didn’t have a chance against these two. I would have intervened but I was also looking forward to see him bump and grind with girls onstage, so I changed my mind. Don’t judge me. I know you liked it too. And besides it was better than the other options: Kyuhyun saying on an interview that we are getting married or Minho singing IU’s Good Day in Star King.
Sender: Choi Minho Hyung, can I go to the men’s room? ^^ Sent: 12-15-11, 09:49pm Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Sender: Changmin hyung No, you can’t. <.< Why do you have to ask ME? Go on your own. OTL Sent: 09:57pm Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Sender: GaemGyu hu u txting? I’m right here beside u. Ur making ur boyfriend jelly. Kkkkkkk~ XD Sent: 12-12-11, 10:00pm Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Sender: My Man Shim Changmin OTL Sent: 12-12-15, 10:02Pm Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
After Wook’s song number, Kyu punched in a new song.
Zero. One. Two. Two. Six. Five. I heard the machine generated voice recite it. Wook grabbed the tambourine on my lap and passed me the microphone.
“Your turn.” He wiped his sweat with his hanky before sitting down. He looked drained so he recharged by drinking lemon iced tea. No makkeoli or soju tonight because Super Junior has a broadcast tomorrow. The last time they tried that, Siwon hyung burned their souls and made them recite some prayers because Sungmin was too drunk to even walk. They had to carry him home and he couldn’t perform the next day because of a bad case of hangover.
The music played and I fell silent.
Hug. Our debut song.
Suddenly memories flooded me, blocking out my friends’ noise. Hearing even only the first few notes send me instantly to a fit of nostalgia. My hyungs and me singing this song for the first time on stage. The start of our career’s blossoming. Our rise to fame. Our struggle to enter the Japanese market successfully. Coming back to Korea with a feeling we were forgotten by our Korean fans because we were away too long. Holding that trophy in MKMF that somehow gave us hope that it wasn’t over for us. Conflicts within the group and with the management. The hyungs leaving. Lawsuits.
“Hyung, the song is starting.” Mino tapped my shoulder. I flinch startled before gathering my senses to take the huge remote pad and stop the song.
“ This is not fun. Let’s go home. You guys have a performance tomorrow… and you Minho, you have to practice the English rap. It’s It’s not Is.” I headed out first.
As I walked away from the cashier after paying our bill (Yes I paid the bill coz I lost a bet this time and I’m not telling you what kind of bet it was.) I checked my mobile phone if I had any messages. I have fifteen missed calls from the same number that didn’t match anyone in my phonebook. Great. Now my mobile number got leaked too. I swear I will snap the neck of whichever idiot accidentally or not gave our numbers away. These prank calls from fan girls have to stop. I’m getting a new number first thing tomorrow.
Kimi wa doko ni ite? Dare to doko ni ite?
I wonder where and who you are with
Donna fuku o kite? Nani shite waratterun darou?
What clothes you are wearing, and what you would be laughing about
Boku wa koko ni ite. Ima mo koko ni ite. Kimi to futari de mata aeru to shinjiteiru yo
I’m here and still here believing that both of you will meet again
Kawarazu omotte iru yo
I was thinking without change
Kimi dake omotte iru yo
Thinking only about you
“Changminah, Yunho hyung.” My hands and feet went cold when I heard the low yet soothing voice of Yoochun hyung.
“Have you had dinner? I’ve been trying to call Changmin but he wasn’t answering his phone. This punk wouldn’t even answer his own hyung’s call. Ha-ha.” He laughs casually as if this hasn’t been the first time we talked over the phone in a long time.
“Yes. I ordered jajjangmyun for myself because Changmin went out to play with Kyuhyun again.” Yunho hyung is calmer today than when he heard Jaejoong hyung’s voice mail.
“Shim Changmin, I heard you’re gay now for Kyuhyun after breaking up with BoA. Ha-ha.”
“Shut up hyung. You know Kyuhyun is my best friend. And honestly, I’m not heartbroken. I only dated noona because of my mom’s wishes. Anyway, when are you coming back?” I almost shouted the last sentence. It’s not that I’m avoiding the teasing but I really wanted to know when will they come back to us.
“I’m sure Jaejoong hyung told Yunho hyung when they met up. We’re coming back when there is a better draft for our contracts. Not just for the three of us... But for us all.”
Silence.
“We will be on the charity concert next week on Christmas day. If you’re free. We would really appreciate it if you come and watch us.” Hyung tried not to meet my eyes but I saw a gleam of tears forming.
“The three of us have an important appearance that day too.”
“Ah.... ok. Maybe you’ll come see us then some other time. Right, Yoochunah? Tell Jaejoong that I miss him. And to Junsu, that hyung loves him no matter what. I’m sure Changmin misses him. His old Yunho hyung over here is no fun to be with. That’s why he keeps ditching me for his boyfriends.”
“Yah! Will you stop it with the boyfriend jokes? … Yoochun hyung. I missed you. The three of you. Come back please. Neh?” Even my voice was pleading. I’m not usually the type who would beg for anything. But having them back is certainly worth begging for.
Geureona onjena gudun tajin punijyo
Horwever, it's always just a hard promise.
Dashin noreul geu agomal gorago
That I'm going to save you again , no matter what.
Dusoneul moa gidohaejyo
I put my hands together and prayed
Geudeon onyongiwa jihel dalago
For endless courage and wisdom
Christmas day, we rehearsed the song for the last time onstage. I half heartedly dragged my body to my position and went along with the steps mindlessly (Honestly, you don’t even need talent for this song’s steps.) Hyukjae hyung didn’t seem too happy as he swirled around with Onew in the part where he should be linking arms with Junsu hyung, his best friend. Minho did ok with the rap even if his accent wasn’t really all that great. I’m not a native speaker but I know how it should sound like as I have always heard Yoochun hyung speaking in English back then. Before I start sounding bitter again, I should say that I’m pretty pleased to see Kangin and Heechul hyung today. They sported really short military haircuts. Heechul hyung looked like a manly man, far from what he used to look like when we first sang this. Kangin hyung on the other hand looks really buff now. The army did his body great. I wonder if Eeteuk hyung would look manlier too when he enlists in the army. I can’t see ZhouMi anywhere.
After three rounds of rehearsals we went to our designated area and started to prepare for our part. The concert was already starting. F(x) was first to perform. We watched them from behind for a while before going to our dressing room. There were a lot of dressing rooms or rather, dressing tents as they were actually white tents that are about three by three meters each. Yunho hyung and I had one, just for us two. Jihye noona was checking our clothes one last time while the other stylists did the finishing touches on our hair and makeup. Yunho hyung usually takes longer as he had a bad habit of making the stylist laugh with his antics while being groomed.
I stood up and looked at my image on the mirror. Hair in place and well groomed: check. Makeup that’s not too thick but covers the major problem areas: check. Ridiculous winter clothes that are so 2005: check. A fake smile that’s gonna last me till all this bullshit ends: check. Seems I’m already set. Let’s just get this over with. They better treat me to a good dinner after this. Just saying.
While thinking about ways on how I could get back at Kyuhyun and Minho, I walked around the room to stretch. Looking around, I saw Jihye noona on the phone, probably talking to her fiancé. I’m really amused by the fact that she has been our coordi for years and her closeness with hyung only gets attention now because of her blonde hair. I suggest all the coordis and backup dancers die their hair blonde and see what fans say.
And then I felt something urgent.
“Where is our lunch? It’s eleven thirty.” No one answered except for my stomach that growled back at me. What kind of charity is this? No one is giving us any food. I’m hungry. Jihye noona just shrugged. Noona why are you so biased to hyung? You hold his umbrella and even tie his shoelace like he is your son. While you don’t even care that I’m dying of starvation here. Life is unfair.
Since no one was paying attention to me starving, I headed out the door to check if the others had food in their rooms. Is it that easy to forget to feed us? Upon stepping out of our door, saw a big manila paper attached on the wall by masking tape right across our door. I read the list scrawled on the manila paper and felt a knot in my stomach. And no, that’s not because I’m hungry… although I’m pretty hungry at the moment. But it’s something different.
CHRISTMAS GIFT CONCERT 2011
1. 1,2, 3 - f(x)
2. Like a dream - TRAX
3. Healing - TRAX feat Key
3. For the First Time - Kangta
4. The first noel -Jang Ri In
5. Slow Motion - Lee Yeonhee feat Taemin
6. Diamond- SNSD
7. The Boys [English] - SNSD
8. Hot Times - SM the Ballad
9. Distance - Boa
10. I'll eat you up - Boa
11. 7989 - Kangta and Go Ara
12. J-min - Happy Max
13. Amazing- The Grace
14. One More Chance - The Grace
15. Candy[H.O.T.] - SHINee
16. Last Christmas - SHINee
17. Santa U are the one -Super Junior
18. Show me your love - DBSK and Super Junior
19. HUG- DBSK and SJ-KRY
20. Snow Dream- SM Town
I stormed back into the room trying to find our manager hyung. Why the hell is he not here?
“Yunho hyung! No one told me we would be singing Hug… Why is it listed there?” I demanded but hyung’s face read that he didn’t know about it either. Now, I’m not the only one who is against singing our past songs. Hyung doesn’t like it too. The only difference is I’m more vocal about it, making me look like a drama king.
Hyung dialed our manager’s number but couldn’t reach him. I went around looking for SM Entertainment staff who could possibly be responsible for this bull. But crap, they weren’t really kidding when they said that they’ll just send us only with our own coordis. No executives whatsoever. I forgot that this is a charity concert and not an official SM Town event. I changed plans and went looking for the organizers instead.
I’m sweating like a dog literally. My clothes are drenched in makeup and sweat, and it’s winter! Jihye noona will be mad; she hates it when our clothes get stained. Not minding that I look like a mess, I did another round in all the tents shaking up each and everyone, trying to find who to blame.
I went last to SHINee’s tent. Ugh. They looked like clowns in their H.O.T. Candy inspired outfit. Annd that was an insult to the clowns not to SHINee. They were big and colorful. And ridiculous. Think of oversized plumber suits having unprotected sex with M&Ms. Then, their crotch-spawns get abducted by the mad hatter from wonderland. That’s SHINee right now. I would’ve laugh but I remembered that I’m supposed to be still pissed.
“Changmin hyuuuung~” Not now Minho. I’m busy trying to find out whose ribcage should I break right now.
“Hyung our clothes don’t have pockets. Can you keep my hand phone?” I am not a property custodian here. Didn’t you deposit it as we all did a while ago? But fine. To shut you up. I slid his mobile on one of my pockets. (My coat has about a hundred pockets) And left when I couldn’t find the damned organizer.
BoA is now performing Eat You Up. Which reminds me that I’m still hungry. Halfway through the concert and still, no sign of the organizer. All the people at the backstage are either SM coordis or utility people.
Damn it. It’s so cold. Why is there no heater? Now, I want to pee. This is not cool.
I went looking for the men’s room, which by the way is a lot easier to find than the person to blame for the misunderstanding in the song list. It wasn’t very far from our own tent.
After getting my business done in the john, I was about to look for the culprit again when an old man crept up behind me. Thank Buddha I just peed or I would have to explain to Jihye noona a weird yellowish stain in my crotch area.
“Are you… are you Changmin of Dong Bang Shin Gi?” No sir. I’m tall so I must be Sooyoung of SoNyeo ShiDae. Want to see me dance Gee?
The old man was probably in his sixties. He had very thick eyeglasses which I doubt if it actually helped him see. He looked practically blind. He had a walking cane. His hair was all white and had a matching fluffy white beard. If Santa Claus was real and spoke Korean, this has got to be him.
“My granddaughter is a big fan of yours. I’m glad that you will sing Hug. That’s her favorite. You are her favorite. I will record your performance later. ” The old man smiled and I forgot I was supposed to be bitchy right now. I bowed down to him.
“How old is your granddaughter, sir? Why isn’t she watching today?” I politely asked him. Damn old nice people. Why is it that it’s so hard to tell them heartbreaking things like Sorry we’re not singing Hug today. Suck it up.
Oh well. He said I’m her granddaughter’s favorite so I should be nice.
“She is twenty-one, I will introduce you to her when she wakes up. I think you would like her. She is a really nice girl. But she has been in a coma for two years now... Or was it three? Hahaha. I don’t really know... Time flies by so fast... Anyway, tell your four other members good luck. I don’t know all their names. All I know is that there are five of you handsome and talented boys and you sing Hug.” the old man slowly turned away and headed to the door step by step with his cane. He was humming our song as he blurred out off my sight. I felt as if I grew roots on that spot where I was standing. I couldn’t move or even wave goodbye.
His granddaughter doesn’t know that there is only Yunho hyung and me now. And he thinks that there will be the five of us today. Somehow, I felt bad that we will disappoint him. His words bounced in my head. All I know is that there are five of you. Five. Five. What do I do now? I paused for a while and thought of Cassiopeia. This girl is actually much luckier than the rest in a way. She didn't have to see us fall apart right before her eyes. When she wakes up, I wonder what Dong Bang Shin Gi she'll see. Truthfully, when she wakes up, I hope that she'll see the five of us again as if nothing has happened.
All I know is that there are five of you.
…….There will be five of us today with KRY ... right?
I headed back to our tent and let the stylists retouch my hair and makeup. Silently, I sat on the corner and watched as Jihye noona’s fiancé set out the food he brought for her. So they didn’t really provide us food? Why the hell am I even doing this?
Dear Santa, if ever you are real, I better be in your “nice list”. Just saying
Finally, it was time for our performance. I don’t know but I’m less reluctant to do this after I met that old strange man in the men’s room. Kyuhyun is performing A-Cha with his hyungs now. There are twelve Super Junior members on the stage… oh hey! There’s Kibum. I count thirteen. Yunho hyung is here. Onew should be coming from the other side of the stage and …. Where the hell is Minho? He better not be missing today. Not now.
Without a trace of my dongsaeng at the stage side, I decided to make a run for it. I found him in SHINee’s tent. This idiot. What the hell? Really.
“What are you doing here? We are starting. And why are you still wearing that plumber suit? That maybe in fashion when Kangta sunbaenim debuted, but that was in 1996. Our concept for this song is 2005. Fashion be damned. Let’s go.” I dragged him by the arm to the side stairs just in time. A-cha’s last pose.
I pulled him up the stage but this kid is reluctant. Does he think he has a prayer on me in a game of tug-o-war?
“Hyung go ahead.” No Minho. Kyu and I thought you a lot of things, good and bad, but being a prima donna is not one of those. Don’t be one. Not now.
Kyuhyun ran towards us. At last, reinforcement. But why the hell is he going down the stage? And helping Minho push me up towards the middle. Damn it. The song is starting. Run.
♫♪Yeah~ What a sweet time!
TVXQ with a new family Super Junior!!
The reason why I'm shy! Because of your blue eyes!
Pure Beauty! Don't hide it from my side!
You know it. It's like bling bling ball!
Can't stop it even though it's not that cool.
Is it just really cold and I’m hallucinating things or I’m really hearing Yoochun hyung rap? I am frozen again. Everyone burst forward while I’m standing still at the back.
Arumdaun nunkochul barabomyon
orinshijol somsatangi to olla
gudewa ham-ke gu shijo-rul chuog hal su inun
henguni nege dagaondamyon haha
These beautiful snow flowers
remind me of cotton candy from my childhood
If only I was lucky enough to have memories of us
I don’t hear a thing Heechul hyung is saying right now. Dear senses, please get back here this instant. Sincerely, Changmin.
Gamchwowadon gude maumul ijen bol su ige hejwoyo
Let me see the feelings you have for me
Now I’m hearing and seeing Jaejoong hyung too. Is this the effect of hunger?
Noui jonhwa soge sumanhun saram gu soge amuin nanun shirhoyo
I don't like any of the people whose phone numbers you have
Sungmin hyung, after you sing your line, please pinch me and tell me this isn’t a dream.
Nomu ore gidarin narul ajigdo mollayo nan yogi inunde
You still don't know I've been waiting here all along
Hearing Junsu hyung’s voice and seeing Jaejoong hyung’s face as he turned around, I’m now sure that it’s real. I can’t be dreaming this up
Ojig gude mamul tara nega ganun goshiramyon. That’s what I see in your eyes.
If only your heart was a place I could visit. That’s what I see in your eyes.
Buddha, Siwon hyung’s God, Santa, I think you all like me right? Thank you for bringing my hyungs back.
Just show me your love to onjena hamke itdorok. Nan gidohalkeyo.
Just show me your love so that we can always be together. I’ll pray for it.
I’ll pray for it….I sang to the meaningful words and danced along. This is the happiest performance I’ve had in more than two years.
Jigum ne maumdo hinnunsoge sahyoga. Guriumi nomu manhjanha
These feelings of mine are covered by white snow. There are too many clouds
I can see Yunho hyung and Hyukjae hyung smiling from my spot too.
I’ll go anywhere. Kude wonhaneun odirado.Ne sonul jabayo
I’ll go anywhere. Anywhere you want me to go. Take my hand.
I glanced over to where Kyuhyun, Onew and Minho were. They were smiling back at me. Minho is waving his Kyu-line phone at me.
Hin nuni omyon gu nunul tago nara
When the white snow falls, I'll ride it and fly
Wait. his mobile is in my pocket right?
On sesangul neryoda bol su ige
So that I can look upon the whole world.
I sang my lines with conviction and renewed happiness.
After the song, I rushed to my hyungs and they welcomed me in their arms. We didn’t even notice that Super Junior went down the stage and everyone was shouting our names. I looked at the crowd and I saw a familiar red ocean flowing with tears of happiness just like the ones that were in our eyes. Those few minutes seemed like forever. it instantly made up for the time we have lost. All the longing. All the doubts. All the hurt and misunderstandings of the past, washed away by the red ocean of tears.
Hope. Forgiveness and love. That is all there is now. All the questions that were left hanging for two years were erased and need not be answered anymore. The answer is here with us. The five of us. Right here. Right now. It felt just like the first time we were together on stage again. Only this time, our bond was stronger than ever.
I shifted my gaze at my friends at the side of the stage still waving at me. I felt my pocket vibrate.
Minho, you sly fox…err.. frog. You got my phone from the custodian and gave it to me when I thought it was yours. I read his message.
Sender: Choi Minho Enjoying our Christmas gift for you hyung? Kyuhyun hyung and I worked really Hard to keep it a secret. Merry Christmas hyung ^^ Saranghaeyo <3 Sent: 12-25-11, 01:46pm Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Sender: Changmin Hyung Yes. Gomawo. I love you too. <3 Sent: 12-25-11, 01:56pm Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Sender: GaemGyu I’m jelly T^T Why don’t I get a saranghae? I’m the legal boyfriend here. Kkkkkk >:DDDDD Sent: 12-25-11, 01:58am Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
Sender: My Man Shim Changmin Kyuhyunah~ are you watching me? Saranghaeyo <33333 Happy? Merry Christmas. Sent: 12-25-11, 02:00 Number: 019 XXXX YYYY |
“Does this mean you’re going back to us hyungs??”
“The new draft of our contract seems fine to us.”
“Why didn’t you tell us before hand?”
“We wanted to surprise you both hyung.”
“You could’ve at least dropped a hint”
“I told you that we have an important appearance today when I called.”
“Hyung’s the music is starting!!!”
“Dong Bang Shin Gi get on your positions.”
"Hyung, we have an ahjjushi fan. I met him on the men's room."
"Really?"
"He sends us all good luck."
"HWAITIIIINGG!!!"
“U-know Yunho~”
“Hwaiting!”
“Mickey Yoocheon~”
“Hwaiting!”
“Choikang Changmin~”
“Hwaiting!
“Youngwoong Jaejoong~”
“Hwaiting!”
“…”
“Yah~ Xiah Junsu Hwaiting!!!!”
"Eu kyang kyang kyang!!!"
♪♫Haruman nibangui chim nega dwaego shipeooh baby♪♫
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