A Sorta Fairytale

Pairing: jae-everyone

Genre:  crack, badfic

Rating: R

Length:  One-shot

Capslock crack after the jump

SO ONCE UPON A SHENANEGAN THERE LIVED THIS PUHREETEE PRINCESS CALLED JAEDERELLA... NOW JAE AS HE/SHE/IT/WTF-IS-JAE-ANYWAY? IS CALLED, LIVED UNDER THE SEA AND HAD SEVEN STEP-SISTARS NAMED SPONGEBOB, PATRICK, MR CRABS (HE IS A SISTAAR OF JAE REGARDLESS OF HIS GENDER FUCK YOU), SANDY, PLANKTON, GARRY AND SQUIDWARD...

THEY WERE ALL SO FUCKIN MEAN TO HIM AND WONT LEAVE HIM ALONE WITHOUT WANK COZ HE'S SUCH A PUHREETEE ASS AND SHIZZ...

SO ONE DAY HE SAID "IM OUT BITCH!!" AND ROLLED OVER TO THE NEXT GHETTO ALLEY TO LIVE IN WITH SEVEN SEA-DWARFS NAMED DOPEY, GROGGY, BITCHY, SAPPY, KIKWANG, TAEYANG AND JONGHYUN.... THEY ARE ALL NO TALLER THAN TWO FEET BUT DONT TELL THAT TO JONGHYUN COZ HELL SMACK A BITCH WITH HIS NOSTRILS OF DOOM....

PLEASE DONT TELL HIM I JUST SAID THAT. THIS IS SRS BSNS. IM SCARED.

NOW BACK TO OUR STORY...

JAE DID ALL THE HOUSEWORK AS THE MIDGETS WENT TO WORK FOR THE PIMPEST PIMP IN ALL PIMPHOOD PIMP!CHUN.... THE PIMP MADE THEM ALL PURPLE LIKE THAT ALONG WITH THE GINGERBREADMAN TILL THE BREAK OF DAWN. HE WILL SAY "SHAKE YER ASS OFF BITCHES OR I'LL DESTROYS YOU LIKE ENGRISH!!"

JAE SCRUBBED THE FLOORS OF THE MIDGET-HOUSE WHILE SHOOTING SOME QUALITY PRON IN HIS SPARE TIME...... WHILE DOING HIS USUAL BSNS WITH THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBOR DOLPHINMAN/ASSMAN/SU HE HEARD A KNOCK ON THE DOOR....

"OH BITCH PLZ!!" WAILED ASSMAN!SU AS JAE TOOK A HALT IN EXCAVATING HIS ASSET.... WHAN JAE OPENED THE DOOR HE SAW YUNWHORESULA WITH HIS RAINBOW COLORED TENTACLES WHICH GAYLY FLAILS AROUND AND EXCRETES SKITTLE FLAVOURED JIZZ ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH......

NOW THIS YUNWHORESULA LOOKED A FUCKIN SCARY LOT LIKE JAE'S MEANEST STEP SISTAR SQUIDWARD SO SCARED AS A BASKET OF BANANAS HE QUICKLY KNELT DOWN AND GAGGED HIMSELF WITH ONE OF YUNWHORES TENTACLES... AND HE TASTED THE RAINBOW....

WHAT JAE DIDNT KNOW IS THAT THE FRUITYMANJUICE CONTAINS A VIRUS HALF AS DEADLY AS CHANGMINOCOCCEMIA... THAT IS DEADLY ENOUGH TO KILL 234,556,753 PREGNANT FANGIRLS EXCLUDING DEATHS OF MINSU SHIPPERS WHICH AMOUNTS TO 125,645,777 WITH JUST ONE SONIC SCREAM.... NOW MULTIPLY THAT BY THE TIMES CHANGMIN SCREAMS IN RISING SUN....

JAE DROPPED DEAD BUT FUCK... IS HE STILL BEAUTIFUL EVEN WHEN HE'S DEAD SO THE WHORE GAVE HIM THE ANTIDOTE THEN FUCKED HIM SENSELESS WITH HIS FRUITY TENTACLES. YES ASSMAN!SU IS STILL THERE. EVERYONE FORGETS ABOUT HIM.

NOW WITH ALL THE SCREAMIN, WAILIN AND MOANING THAT THE PRINCESS JAE MADE, THEY WOKE UP THE DRAGON MIGHTY MAX (WHO IS THE ORIGINAL CARRIER OF CHANGMINOCOCCEMIA) AND IT DESTROYED BIKINI BOTTOM AND EVERYONES PANTIES WITH ALL IT'S MIGHTINESS AND OSMNESS.... WHEN YUNWHORE CAME A MAGICAL DONUT CAME-OUT OF HIS FAVOURITE PINK TENTACLE AND WHEN JAE TOOK A BITE OF THE DONUT HAVOC WRECKED IN GAYVILLE

"OHMIGHADDD!!!! I HAS A VAJAEJAE!!!!!!" YELPED GAYJAE AS HE STARED AT HIS WET KITTEH.........

SEEING THE DISGUSTING FEMALE GENITALIA YUNWHORE PURPLED BACK TO HIS CAVE AND HUMPED PLANKTONS INSTEAD....

WITH THE SMELL OF THE KITTEH THE PIMPCHUN WOKE UP AND LEFT ALL HIS PIMPIN BSNS.... HE WENT TO THE MIDGET HOUSE AND SAW GAYJAE NOW WIF A VAJAEJAE...

"CUMMERE BEBE!!" THE PIMP PIMPISHLY PIMPED......

"STFU MOFO !!!! CANT U SEE?? I HAS VAJAEJAE!"

"I KEELS KITTEHS!"

 "YOUR ENGRISH SUCKS"

"NOW SUCK THIS!"

SO THE PIMP RAVISHED THA PRINCESS TILL DAWN AND THEY PURPLED LIKE THAT.

A Sorta Fairytale by firemoth_007 or Mayi is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.